Engaged
by AbbyCarter-Lara
Summary: A Holby City story about Tash and Kirstie. Will they make it?
1. Engaged

Engaged

By Kayleigh

Tash sat in the waiting room of the doctors. It wasn't anything serious, just a regular check up. This was the time when she needed Kirstie, when she missed Kirstie. A lot of the time she felt guilty because she didn't have the time to think about her, she was too busy at the hospital. She was progressing quickly, consultant now.

The first month after Kirstie left was awful. Every time the door opened she had to check if it was Kirstie come back to be with her, every time the phone rang she would pick it up hoping that it was Kirstie. It never was. Every Collins that came up to the ward, she had to remind herself to keep breathing. She was scared for Kirstie. She was scared for herself, what would she do without her?

* * * * * * * *

Kirstie sat in the dentist's waiting room. She hated coming. It was the noise of the drill, it when right through her. This was when she needed Tash. Just someone to hold her hand and tell her she was going to be all right.

Kirstie knew she'd blown it. Tash didn't want her, Holby held nothing for her without Tash. She'd moved very quickly after leaving Holby City Hospital. She'd thought about staying but she couldn't face any more rejection. Not just from Tash, from everyone and everything.

She stayed with her sister for a while but they'd never got on to start with and living together was impossible. It had lasted just three weeks. During those three weeks she'd stood outside Tash's flat. Deliberately doing it when she knew Tash was on shift. She couldn't face her, not back then anyway.

She'd moved up to Halifax a few weeks after that. She didn't know where to go at first. London was an option she's discounted because it was too big for her to be alone in. She also considered Scotland, no too far away. She wanted somewhere that was small enough for her to fit in but big enough for her to blend in.

In the end she'd got the England A to Z out and flipped it open. Wherever it opened was where she moved to. Halifax it was.

* * * * * * * *

"Miss Bandara" the receptionist called. "Dr Collins will see you now."

Tash's heart skipped a beat. Could it be? She practically ran down the corridor and knocked on the door. She went in, her heart in her mouth. Could it be Kirstie?

She went in, looking at the young doctor, the young blonde doctor. Her heart sank and her face dropped.

"Is everything all right Miss Bandara?" she'd obviously noticed.

"What? Oh yes, yes. Fine, thank you." She replied despondently.

"Just a regular check up?"

"Yes. My annual medical, I'm a surgeon." She told the doctor. She knew what she was doing and didn't want to stay a minute longer than was strictly necessary.

"Ah right, well do you have any obvious health problems?"

Tash sat back in the chair, full of disappointment. _I'm nursing a broken heart, how's that sound? _"No, nothing I can think of."

The doctor smiled at her, "Well, I'll check you over then I've got a few general questions for you, ok?"

"Fine, whatever."

* * * * * * * *

The chair slowly fell backwards. Instinctively Kirstie opened her mouth. She gripped the arms of the chair. This was the part she hated. Mr Randall's smarmy grin peered over at her. She squeezed her eyes tight shut and thought of happy times.

She remembered the first day of medical school, she'd seen Tash that very first day. She sat next to her one day and they got talking. She never in a million years thought someone like Tash would be interested in her. But, two years later they were closer than she could've ever dreamed.

Two years after that the pressure was starting to get to them both but neither wanted to be the one to let go.

"Miss Collins, you need a filling or two."

"Fine, whatever." Kirstie mumbled through a mouth full of dentist's hand.

Forty minutes later Kirstie walked out of Clare Hall Dentists clutching her mouth. Clearly when the dentist had said a filling he also meant removing a couple of teeth as well. _This is when I need someone to hold my hand and tell me it'll all be fine. Kiss it better, _she thought. But she didn't need someone, she needed Tash.

* * * * * * * *

Tash walked out of the surgery. What a let down. Medical, she hated them. They were pointless, she was in perfect health and could've done a much better job than that useless GP. Well, perfect health apart from the newly acquired bruises slowly forming from all the poking Dr Collins had done.

And in her personal life as well. General questions, I think not! "How many sexual partners in the last 3 years?" What sort of a question is that for a medical? The answer was easy, one.

"Kirstie" she sighed softly. Everyday since Tuesday 30th of November 2000 she'd thought about the day they would be reunited. The day they would fall back into each other's arms. The day that would make the past 623 days seem worth it.

She got into her small green car. The colour reminded her of Kirstie but it wasn't obvious to everyone around her. She couldn't abide people asking about her private life. She didn't want to make the ulterior motive for buying the car obvious.

Turning the keys, the radio came on. Dance music during the day, she couldn't stand it. Shoving a tape entitled "Kirstie" into the deck she settled into the short drive home.

Because of the appointment she didn't have to be in work until 8:30 the following morning. Pulling up to her road she flicked the tape out. She knew what was coming next, she just couldn't bear to listen to it.

* * * * * * * *

Kirstie got out of the car humming the tune the had just filled the car on the drive home. She loved that tape, it was her "Tash" tape. They had put all their favourite CDs together one evening in medical school. Kirstie had made a tape of those songs. She'd made a copy for Tash as well, but it had been thrown back at her when they split.

"Words" by Boyzone was their song. Kirstie permanently had it playing in the car. She hoped Tash remember as well but thought it highly improbable. She knew the words off by heart, backwards and upside down. They were so fitting, they suited her relationship whatever way you looked at it. She'd never been very good showing what she felt. She needed to say it.

She walked up the small path to her front door. She loved this house. It was just the type Tash would like. She threw her bag down at the bottom of the stairs and hung her coat up. She sat down at the breakfast bar in her kitchen. Reaching for a half empty _No lets be positive _half full bottle of wine and a glass she switched on the television. Pouring herself a glass she realised she only drank wine because Tash does, did.

She settled down with her wine and doritos to watch ER. She only watched it because Tash had done but it reminded her of good times. She had to carry on watching it, for her memories sake.

* * * * * * * *

Tash sat in front of the TV with a glass of wine contemplating the love lives of Abby and Carter in ER. She only watched it because she thought Kirstie did. She wanted a lasting reminder of her, and this was it. A stupid TV programme.

One hour later Tash felt thoroughly depressed and alone. It was worse than Eastenders. How come other people's lives are so good and hers was going down the drain?

She picked up the wine, a 1980 Bordeaux. No doubt one that Kirstie had picked. Awful, she hated the taste of red wine and rarely drunk it now, but Kirstie had liked an odd glass so she'd put up with it. She downed the glass and picked up her mobile phone. _It's now or never._

* * * * * * * *

Kirstie turned the television off.

"Eurgh" she told the remote. "That was awful!" So soppy, she didn't know why she even watched it anymore. Yes she did. She picked up her filo-fax and flicked through the address pages.

Her fingers shook as she dialled the number.

Holding the phone to her ear she listened to the dial tone sending her request. She lowered the receiver, she couldn't do it. _Yes, you can! _You can do it.

* * * * * * * *

"Shit, engaged!"

Two people unwittingly spoke in unison. They were close even if they were miles apart.

"I'll try again later." Tash told Kirstie's answer phone.

"Hope to hear from you soon." Kirstie told Tash's.


	2. It's All About The Call

It's All About The Call By Kayleigh 

She put down the phone, "Damn it!" She hit the table, hard. All sorts of things were running through her head. Who was Tash on the phone to? A new girlfriend, or was she in trouble?  She was about to pick up the phone and call her back when she nearly jumped out of her seat. The phone was ringing.

"Hello?" she said cautiously.

"Welcome to BT Callminder. You've one new message. Press 1 to listen."

She hit the button to be greeted by a very familiar voice, "Hi Kirstie, I hope I've got the right number. Anyway, you're busy. I'll try again later."

She put down the phone, feeling a little shell-shocked. Then she picked the phone up and listened to the message again. She sat for a while in complete disbelief. Then she started to laugh, and laugh, and laugh. She had realised what happened.

* * * * * * * *

Tash sat down on her bed. She'd gone upstairs to check whether she got Kirstie's number right. She had. From what she remembered Kirstie had hated using her phone. She would never answer if she didn't know who was calling. _But that was 7 years ago._

Oh well, she could only wait now. She walked down the stairs to see her answer machine flashing. She hadn't missed the phone had she? She pressed play.

"Message received 10:14, Wednesday August 14th. Hey, it's um Kirstie. You're busy I'll leave you to it. Hope to hear from you soon."

Typical Kirstie, short and sweet. Tash fell back to stairs and sat on the bottom step. How could she have missed that?

"Oh!" she finally twigged. She shook her head and began to laugh.

* * * * * * * *

Kirstie got her mobile out again. She hated the damn thing and all it's radiation. She scrolled through the menu until she got to 'Write Message'.

Slowly and purposefully she typed in a message and sent it to Tash. Feeling happy for the first time in weeks she skipped up the stairs and ran herself a bath. She made sure to leave her mobile within reach. Just in case.

Relaxing back she thought about the future. It no longer looked black, it was shining now.

Laughing to herself about an advert she'd seen earlier she told the sponge; "I've seen the future, it is bright, but it's not orange!"

With that she slid her head under the water and began to properly relax and wash out all the day's impurities. She was going to look good for Tash, whenever the time may come.

* * * * * * * *

Tash lay down on the sofa. She needed a good night's sleep but she was too happy to sleep. Heaven knows she'd tried. In bed she'd kept tossing and turning, couldn't get comfortable. Every time she closed her eyes all she could see was Kirstie. She didn't know what to do, should she ring back? Wait for Kirstie to ring back?

She'd finally settled into a comfortable position on her soft leather sofa when she nearly fell off again. _Why would anyone send me a message at this time of night? _More to the point who had her number to send a message at this time of night?

Pressing the read button she grinned to herself. She knew just who it was. After reading it she put the phone back into her bag and settled back onto the sofa to watch Graham Norton. Maybe she would just sleep easy tonight after all. No more worries about what to do next. Those few short words had sealed her fate.

* * * * * * * *

Kirstie woke up bright and early for her shift. 9 am she started but 6 am she always got up. Habit she'd had since working with Tash. Just another of those little reminders she'd kept doing, just to keep the memory alive. Nowadays she'd got into going to the gym for a good hour before work. It woke her up and got her ready for the day.

Today was different though. She was ready for anything today. No amount of working out could give you the feeling she woke up with. She knew everything was going to be all right from now on. The message had made sure of that. What was worrying is that Tash hadn't replied yet.

Maybe it's the wrong number? Maybe she hasn't got it yet? Maybe she doesn't want to respond? No she put the last one right out of her head. Tash had rung her, she must still think about her.

Laying in bed she began to think about things. Would she invite Tash up for the weekend? What would she cook, what would she wear, where would she sleep? She closed her eyes and dreamed about the day they were reunited, it wasn't too far away now. She could feel it.

* * * * * * * *

Tash walked into work. Kath followed her in and watched her playing with her mobile phone. She couldn't figure out why people bought them. They're expensive, unreliable, annoying. Anyway whatever Tash was doing it was making her grin like a schoolgirl.

She leaned against the side of the lift. She was reading the message for the fifth time that morning. She looked up to see Kath staring at her, a bemused look on her face.

"Is everything ok Tash?" she asked.

"Yes, thank you Kath, it most certainly is." Tash replied with a grin that could've challenged the Cheshire cat.

Kirstie had signed the message as usual. KC. When they were at medical school they used to leave each other notes under tables in lecture halls, in their room, everywhere they knew the other would be. Kirstie would always sign them KC and Tash would sign them TB. Kirstie found it funny that her initials were part of the name of a successful band, whereas Tash's were the initials of a disease, tuberculosis. Every time Tash had told her to blame the parents.

She read the message one last time; she had to keep checking she hadn't imagined it. She hadn't. As they stepped onto the ward Tash put the phone into her bag and got ready for a fabulous day on the ward. Nothing could dampen her mood.

* * * * * * * *

Kirstie stepped out of the house. She hadn't gone to the gym, she didn't need the wake up call or the high working out gave her. She was on a natural high. Those four words she sent to Tash last night gave her that. She re-read the message and set off on the short walk to the hospital.

'I love you, KC x'

How could just four short words make such a difference to two people's lives?


	3. Heaven on Earth

Heaven Is A Place On Earth

By Kayleigh

"Oh, baby do you know what that's worth? Oh, heaven is a place on earth. They say in heaven love comes first. Oh heaven is a place on earth."

The music blasted out of Kirstie's car as she drove the short journey to Sainsbury's. She had a very special visitor, coming to do something she'd never thought could happen again. Well not with who she wanted it to anyway. She'd cleaned the house from top to bottom. Something she did very rarely. She hated cleaning but this time she breezed through it with not a care in the world. She hadn't even moaned to the toy rabbit sat on the television about cleaning the bathroom. All that water slopping around, they have to be self-cleaning!

Wandering up and down the aisles of the supermarket she wondered what to buy. _What sort of things is Tash into now? Is she vegetarian? Does she have any allergies?_ The questions swum round her head as she threw random items into the trolley. If all else failed they could get a takeaway.

As she got to the checkout she glanced at her watch. "Damn it!" she whispered delicately under her breath. Tash was going to arrive in half an hour and she was stuck in what was possibly the longest and slowest moving queue in Halifax.

* * * * * * * *

Tash meanwhile was sat back in her car. An hour into the journey and her nerves had already set in. She was going to see someone she was in love with but hadn't seen for nearly two years. The only contact they'd had was 2 answer phone messages, a text message and a short, hurried phone call as they were both working at the time.

_What if Kirstie is completely different? What_ _if_ _she's_ _not_ _the person I fell_ _in_ _love_ _with? _

"No." She told herself that it would be fine. Everything would work out. It had to have been more than a coincidence that they had phoned each other at exactly the same time. That would make a good conversation. If it went quiet she could always bring that up.

_What if conversation went quiet? _Were they going to run out of things to say to each other? It had never happened before. They'd not seen each other for two years; of course they'd have lots to talk about.

She kept running over things in her mind and before she knew it she was coming off the M62 motorway she had joined what seemed like ten seconds ago, when actually it must've been almost n hour and a half. She went round the island and headed towards Halifax. She was getting close now.

* * * * * * * *

Kirstie changed her top for the fifth time. Looking down at her watch again she saw it was 3:17. Tash was late. _What if she's got lost? What if there was an accident?_

Kirstie picked up the phone and dialled Tash's number. "Hello, Tash?" She breathed a sigh of relief. "Where are you?"

Five minutes later she had changed her top again and was sat in the comfy armchair near the window. She was finally ready to see Tash again. She'd waited so long for this moment and now it was finally coming. The time's she'd dreamed about what to say and how to act had been forgotten now.

She'd read a magazine article a few days ago in the dentists about meeting up with your ex again. It said things could be awkward but Kirstie knew it wouldn't be like that with Tash. They still loved each other. She knew it would be completely natural and things would turn out the way they were supposed to. With them together again.

* * * * * * * *

Tash had got lost and was very relieved when Kirstie had rung. She didn't like to admit she was lost but when Kirstie asked her here she was she'd got no idea. As it turned out she was on the right road but heading the wrong way!

After she'd swung the car round and was going in the right direction it was plain sailing. She'd driven past a big new hospital. It looked very modern. _That must be where Kirstie works _she told herself. Well she'd landed on her feet here all right! It looked like a lovely little town. Lots of houses and as she neared the town centre she saw lots of shops, a gym, swimming baths. And pubs. Lots of them!

Just Kirstie's sort of place! She found herself imagining whether there were any jobs available at the hospital. _Whoa slow down now, you haven't even seen her yet! _She drove up the road Kirstie told her about. "Then take the first left. Carry on until you reach the corner and go up the road, third house on the left." She read Kirstie's dictated instructions aloud.

Pulling up to the house she noticed the green door, Kirstie's old green car, the little overgrown garden. _She'd not changed at all! _She got out of the car and pulled her hair into a ponytail at the back of her head.

"Leave it down. I like it down." She heard a voice behind her. Kirstie was stood on the doorstep smiling.

* * * * * * * *

Kirstie was grinning like an idiot but she couldn't help it. She was overwhelmed. Tash was actually here, finally.

"Come in." 

Tash picked up her bag and walked through the front door. "Wow!" she told Kirstie.

"You like it?" she asked cautiously.

"I love it. And I love you!" She walked over to Kirstie and enveloped her into a warm hug.

"So the message worked did it?" Kirstie asked with a cheeky grin. As an afterthought she kissed Tash lightly. Then she pulled away. _Have I done the right thing? _

The answer was obviously yes as Tash leaned in to kiss her back. The pair just stood there, lost in each other.

* * * * * * * * 

Every story has a happy ending. It just depends on the way you look at it.


End file.
